he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize