You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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