I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Randomize
