the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
My bed smells like the plague
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
