guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
