but the lizard people decide everything anyway
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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