So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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