Define "chronic" masturbator.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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