Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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