i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
