I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize