I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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