Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
