He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize