Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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