there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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