Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize