Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
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