That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Randomize
