so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
