Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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