I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Randomize
