was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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