i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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