new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
