I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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