you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Randomize