evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
do herpes really smell.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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