Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
