Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize
