"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
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