Whoa Z and x make the same sound
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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