Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
