I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
