She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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