nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
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I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
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There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize