Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
