Bisexual people are plain selfish.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
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