she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I think a kid would responsible me up
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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