woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
