TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize