1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Randomize
