Is it normal to miss your booty call?
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
