So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Randomize
