fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
