i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
If I had your ass I would rule the world
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
