I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
