Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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