What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Randomize
