do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
not ubering you a puppy
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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